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[caligulas_aquarium]

this is eridan
aint here right noww so if its important just leavve a message
otherwwise fuck off

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[Voice]

[caligulas_aquarium]

[WELL GEE WHIZZ WHOEVER COULD THIS BE. Honestly, there's a bit of a delay because he sits there contemplating whether this is a good idea or not.

Also ugh no he doesn't want to waste his time with her, either. But w/e. He has priorities. Eridan. Comes. First.

So she actually gets an answer before it rings out.]

...hey.

[Voice]

[speakveryclearly]

[SEADWELLER NOTICED HER REMEMBER HOW TO BREATHE wait, you're a rainbow drinker, you don't need to breathe, OKAY.]

Hey. I was just wondering if you were still on for lunch today, at The Moon. Since after all something could have plausibly come up in the interim. [A little icy:] Given how busy you are.

[Voice]

[caligulas_aquarium]

[Wow don't you give him that tone of voice young lady he is TALKING TO YOU ISNT THAT ENOUGH???????]

Yeah I didn't forget, it's still happenin'. Ain't nothin'-

[Wait god now he IS tempted to just go HEY WAIT SOMETHING CAME UP FUCK YOU but no. Must resist temptation.]

...gonna drag me away from this, alright. Sure is still a thing that's happening.

[Voice]

[speakveryclearly]

[Maybe if she weren't A PERSON WITH FEELINGS!!!]

Good. I'll. See you there.

[DOES SHE.... HANG UP?????? There is a long awkward silence after which she'll probably hang up if he doesn't say anything else.]

[caligulas_aquarium]

[EELINGS!!!!! Awkward silence on his part too, actually.

...

...

...

...

...]

Okay, see you there. Bye.

[CLICK?]

[speakveryclearly]

[C L I C K

She has a table at the restaurant already when he gets there, and that may or may not be where she made the call

Sitting pretty and glowing in the dark

On the moon]

[caligulas_aquarium]

[Wow Kanaya, really. Enthusiastic much. Hell, he took his time getting there too, honestly.

Once he shows up he'll just sit in the chair across from her and...

...well...

...yeah.]

So.

[speakveryclearly]

So.

[She slides a menu over to him. Her expression is in a weird place between shy and predatory.]

...are you getting something.

[caligulas_aquarium]

[Those sure are conflicting. He rests his elbow on the table and props his head against his hand, idly looking over the menu in his other.]

I dunno, it all sounds pretty shit.

Probably just hawe some moon cake.

[speakveryclearly]

That... sounds like a good plan.

[Wow. This is. About eighty times more awkward than she thought it would be. She starts rubbing at her neck out of nerves and then oh no she's thinking about necks and he's right there and she hasn't fed yet today why didn't she do that why did she hope that was stupid stop thinking about his blood stop thinking about his blood STOP THINKING ABOUT HIS BLOOD ANYTHING ELSE COME ON MARYAM YOU'VE GOT IT IN YOUR THINK PAN SOMEWHERE you're not gonna lunge right across the table and go for it like a goddamn terrori--

Aha.]

Oh! Yes. I wanted to... congratulate. You and Roxy. On being matesprits if I've been reading correctly.

[caligulas_aquarium]

[And here he is demanding ordering some mooncake, while listening to Kanaya through one ear. The waiter looks a little displeased at having to deal with Eridan but then most people do so w/e.

He turns back to her once that guy is gone off to get his order and...she what.]

So.

You read my conwersations with other people often, or.

[speakveryclearly]

[Probably more than he'd like, which is why she reacts with a brief indignant flash. But that isn't here or there. She cools off.]

For your information, the lady in question made some more allusions about your relationship to me. [Half truth. She'd said she had a boyfriend.]

[caligulas_aquarium]

Wait, really?

...what'd she say?

[speakveryclearly]

Just that she had a boyfriend, and then after some more conversation it became clear it was you.

[SIDEYEING HIM... Eridan no DON'T GET ANGRY AT HER AGAIN... she can't touch your face in a restaurant]

Was she not allowed to tell me this, either.

[caligulas_aquarium]

Relax, do I look pissed off to you.

[..don't answer that.]

Just good to know she ain't so appalled by the idea that she's got no qualms with tellin' people about it.

[speakveryclearly]

[After realizing he is indeed qualm-free, Kanaya softens a little, relieved, and she helpfully points something out with her finger and her voice both at once.] You look like someone who doesn't know his moon cake just got here.

[caligulas_aquarium]

What.

[Oh, yeah. There sure is moon cake all up in this bitch.

Going for his utensils, so.]

Are you ewen gettin' anythin'.

Or do you just not eat like a regular troll no more.

[speakveryclearly]

[Oh yeah good for him he's FEE... DING... not... thinking about... anything... for herself...]

No, I. I don't eat. Food.

You know why we're called rainbow drinkers, right.

[caligulas_aquarium]

Obwiously, that's why I mentioned not feedin' like a regular troll. I think that indicates enough awareness a' you bein' a bloodsucki-

[Ugh, no, cut out the rainbow drinker slurs.]

...blood. Sucker.

[He was going for bloodsucking parasite, F Y I.]

[speakveryclearly]

Ah. Yeah. That's what I am.

[Yeah.

Yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

God he still hates her doesn't he. This sucks.]

So I'm not. Going to be eating anything. [OR DRINKING ANYTHING... WEH...]

[caligulas_aquarium]

Ok.

[Fair enough then guess he'll just EAT HIS CAKE or something.

It's actually pretty terrible but as long as he's eating he doesn't have to talk.

So he will have his terrible cake and goddamnit he will eat it. Though.]

...didn't make much sense to meet in a place serwin' food then.

[speakveryclearly]

Well, it's sort of a convention when people are meeting in public places, isn't it. From what I understand your apartment wouldn't be serviceable in the slightest, and for that matter neither would mine.

And besides, as you're aptly demonstrating, you do seem to still partake in eating.

[This whole setup - going out of her way to find a socially acceptable interaction opportunity that only stands to benefit him - is yet again their entire relationship at this stage in microcosm.

She taps her fingers, with their black-polished nails, exactly twice on the table.]

[caligulas_aquarium]

Hm.

[Well whatEWER.]

It's a pretty shitty cake though. Way too sweet for my likin'.

[speakveryclearly]

[She frowns reflexively for a moment before reassuming a more neutral expression, somewhat forcing it. There's that dissonance again. YOU AND HIM. AGH. WHY TIME SHIT, WHY.]

What do you think you would have liked more.

[caligulas_aquarium]

Somethin' a bit more bitter. Or I'd ewen settle for sawory.

[He puts his fork down, returning to the menu and looking it over with a scowl.]

Though ewerythin' else sounds awful so not like it matters.